Some people asked me if I will keep writing letter to you. Of course I will. Because writing is the only way to keep someone from disappearing. Because contrary to popular belief; love won’t do. Love never stops things from flying away.
When the night came, he was beside me, sleeping already. I watched him snoring gently with his eyes closed and face tired. I watched him closely and all of his imperfect details completing mine. I thought about love and just like that, I fell asleep in love.
How could the universe handle all the love and hatred of us, human beings, Maera? I kept wondering in my dream, holding him with my flawed little hands.
Sometimes the only way to deal with something is getting used to it because the opposite of love is not hatred, just like the opposite of hatred is not love. They don’t oppose each other. As for me they both oppose the same thing: ignorance. You know you can’t ignore something if you are not used to it.
It’s like a really good song on the radio. At first, you really like it. The second time it was played, you like it even more. At one point, you just love the song and you crave for more and you want to posses it. You buy the song on iTunes and you play the song on repeat. You listen to it over and over again until you start to ignore it when it is played on the radio later. It doesn’t stop you anymore. Would it take a week? A month? A year? It depends on you, because you can’t change the song.
It’s like a really bad memory of a boyfriend. At first it hurts you. A lot. It hurts you that you think your muscles ache. The more you try to forget it, to think about it less, the more and the longer it would hurt you. Get used to it. It would be painful but it would hurt less eventually. Get used to it, to the point it becomes a noise. Get used to it, to the point it doesn’t stop you anymore. Would it take a week? A month? A year? It depends on you, because you can’t change the memory.
Be wise and be brave.