Later I would take you to the big aquarium. Actually, I never like the idea of keeping these living things and showing them off to tourists and getting thirty something dollars and feeding them regularly in return. If you think about this it’s like interspecific slavery, isn’t it? But then, as a human, I have pretty much high hope of my own species. I hope that every child who was brought here would treat the sea better, or even save the entire planet. You might be one. You could be one. Your call.
Anyway, the last time I was there, I was so fascinated by the jellyfishes, just like everyone else. Sometimes it was things like volcano eruption or a glimpse of the galaxy that made us feel insignificant. Other times, it could be something smaller like these magnificent boneless creatures. Looking at them got me thinking, how could they be so beautiful?
Could it be their transparency and their inability to hide anything, Mae?
I know now I’m only 28 and probably I’ll regret what I wrote today more than what I did when I was 14 (or even worse, 21!) Well, but I wrote it anyway, just in case later you want to understand what growing up and moving on was like, from my point of view.
Okay, let’s start with music. I stopped giving mixtape and accepting one. Practically because I’m married and basically I listen to what he listens to and of course I’m too old to try liking new music. Nowadays, it’s either I fall for a song from the first 10 seconds listening, or not at all. Besides, giving a second chance isn’t my forte.
Then, um, well. Now, I think I’m too old to do something because everyone is doing it, or not do it because everyone is doing it. I’m too old to care about what people think about what I do. It’s a good thing from being late 20s, though, in my opinion.
Now, the bad news. Now, I’m too old to hate everyone. I have to deal with people and attend neighborhood gathering (because I have to get an update about the increase of housing complex general facility service fee or other things like that) and soon I have to come to parents’ meeting at school or something like that and a couple of decades from now I’ll possibly be so forgetful and needing help. So yeah, Mae, if you want to hate everyone, do it while you’re young; while people take it as something cute and hormonal.
Oh, I’ll probably create a mixtape for you. Just in case later you ask me what kind of songs I fell for only after 10 seconds. Now, let’s just call it a night.
After years of losing
I found you again
as the last light of the explosion
probably you’ve always been there
but I’ve never got blown apart